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Fr Paddy: Anything that you have to control, controls you

The Past

Anything that you have to control, controls you.

There are many variations to this story, but it’s quite instructive.

In South America, Africa and Asia, the natives have devised a very effective method of trapping monkeys.

The plan is deceptively simple: the natives take a gourd or some similar object and drill a hole just large enough for a monkey’s hand to pass through; they add some extra weight to the gourd with sand or pebbles, then put a nut or some fruit inside and place the gourd where a monkey will find it.

Here’s what happens: the monkey sticks his hand through the hole to get the food but with the prize in its grasp, the monkey cannot get its hand back out.

The hole is too small for the monkey’s hand to pass through so long as it’s holding the treat, and the gourd is too heavy for the creature to carry.

Because the monkey will not let go of its prize, it becomes trapped. The animal gives up its freedom to hold on to a small piece of food.

It seems obvious that all the monkey needs to do is let go of the bait and it can escape. But because it views the treat as its possession and is not willing to let go, the monkey is trapped. It loses its freedom.

It’s easy for us to see how foolish it is to keep holding something that really isn’t worth much.

The monkey is making a very poor trade-off: his freedom for a prize that wouldn’t be that difficult to find in a less threatening location. But the animal is blinded by its attachment to the treat.

The monkey is acting out of instinct; it probably doesn’t have the ability to recognise the danger of grasping the bait or the fact that such behaviour will have a dramatic impact on its future.

But humans should be able to avoid falling into such a trap. We should be able to understand the danger of holding on to things that don’t serve us well. We should realise when we’re creating traps for ourselves.

Unfortunately, most of the traps in life are those we create for ourselves. We hold on for dear life to things that don’t serve us well. We hold on to past mistakes; we cling to the privilege of being right; we won’t let go of anger and resentment; we become attached to material things that are of little value; and we often put our attachment to possessions ahead of our own well-being.

If you’re going to find happiness in life, you need to examine what you hold. Take a close look at the attachments in your life. Do you place more importance on things outside of yourself than on things inside you?

The more important something is in your life, the more you become attached to it. If what you treasure is outside yourself – that is, other things or other people, then you risk being trapped by those bonds.

You have the ability to choose your treasures in life. You need to examine your life to determine if you’re being trapped by the things you treasure. If we’re attached to things, we are restricted, only by letting go can we be free.

Prayer to let go of the Past

Lord Jesus I pray that You would enable me to forget the things which are past and help me to press forward, knowing that my hope and my future is in You.

Help me not to dwell on past hurts and painful memories and enable me to forget what is behind and to walk forward into each new day, holding Your hand.

Lord I release all of the painful memories I have to You and pray that You would help me to renew my mind day by day and to focus my thoughts on the Lord Jesus Christ. Help me also to forgive all those that have caused me pain so that by Your grace

You would help me to fill my heart with new and joyful thoughts. Lord I believe that You came to heal the broken-hearted and set the captives free.

Wash away all these hurtful memories that are causing me so much heartache I pray – and replace them with the joy of my salvation, which I have received in Christ Jesus my Saviour – for which I offer You thanks and praise.

Lord may the words of my mouth and all the thoughts in my mind be filtered through You – and may I build up new memories that are sweetened by the beauty of Your Person, in Jesus name I pray, Amen

SEE ALSO – Fr Paddy: Meandering our way through unprecedented times

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Fr Paddy is a curate in the hugely vibrant Portlaoise Parish. From Carlow town, he was educated in Carlow CBS and studied Business and Politics in Trinity College Dublin before training to be a priest in Carlow College. He is the youngest priest in the Kildare & Leighlin diocese and writes for a number of media outlets. He has almost 14,000 followers on Twitter.