Home Columnists Brian Moss: Bad lights, Zach has our back and poetry for the...

Brian Moss: Bad lights, Zach has our back and poetry for the soul

Come towards the light

A newer greener way of living is certainly a movement that has gained momentum over the past few years and rightfully so.

Local authorities across the country have been tasked with reducing their carbon footprint and not to be found wanting Laois County Council are in the process of installing LED public lighting around the county. But at a meeting of county councillors this week, authorities were accused of keeping locals in the dark, literally!

According to the brightest of sparks, Cllr Willie Aird, the light provided by the new LEDs  aren’t up to scratch and Willie was his usual matter of fact self in pointing this out at a meeting of the Portlaoise Municipal District.

According to Cllr Aird, “It’s like you went into your kitchen and took the light out of your ceiling and replaced them with a lamp – that’s how bad these lights are.”

Very illuminating indeed from the good councillor.

The council have pointed out that the LEDs will save money and reduce the council’s carbon footprint which is all very good and we certainly want to see change.

But we also want to be able to see in the dark!! Hopefully a resolution can be brought to light.

No stepping out of line in Aldi

If you’re one of the “kids these days get too much” brigade firstly welcome! Secondly you’ll be happy with the news this week that Aldi are limiting the number of certain Christmas toys customers can buy in an effort to ensure the Christmas joy is spread as far as possible (and not Covid).

According to a spokesperson for the retail outlet store, Marshalls will be in place to ensure compliance. I’ve said it before, you don’t mess with the Germans!

Now if only they could put a restriction on the number of paper shredders I can buy every time I go in there I’d be sorted!

Zach’s got the Town’s back

What a week it’s been for Aussie Rules superstar and Portlaoise’s own Zach Touhy.

Zach was instrumental in his side Geelong’s win over Brisbane and booking a place in this weekend’s Grand Final, the equivalent to an All  Ireland Final for those who might not be au fait with the footie from down under.

Zach was quick to correct some of the misconceptions about his hometown in an hilarious post match interview on Aussie TV including informing the interviewers that Portlaoise does indeed have the internet and that carrier pigeons aren’t in use to spread word of Zach’s success!

(Although to be fair, access to the internet isn’t universal here just yet until rural broadband is actually rolled out, so they weren’t completely wrong )

Top stuff from Zach. You can take the man out of Portlaoise and all that …

It’s a huge weekend for Zach and the Touhys as the Portlaoise man looks to cement his position as the most successful Irish export to play Aussie Rules.

We’ll have all limbs crossed that he can be part of the winning side this weekend!

Poetry for the soul 

If you’re like me you’re probably part of a million different WhatsApp groups that you’ve actually forgotten that you’re still in.

I’m still part of a group from a stag that’s so long ago the couple in question have since married and divorced!

About the only advantage of being involved in these fringe groups is that occasionally a video or meme is sent my way that really gets the giggles going.

This video of the brilliant Leitrim poet Seamus O’Rourke came my way the other day and I thought it’s a perfect week to share some levity.

Here Seamus recites his poem “Hard Border” for RTE where he points out why the folk in Leitrim want one, very funny, have a watch below, it’s worth the three minutes or so!

The C Word ….

When I signed this lucrative contract with LaoisToday it was stipulated very clearly that in no uncertain circumstances was I ever to  use the C-word but I’m afraid I’m about to … CHRISTMAS.

As I write this it’s a mere 64 days till Christmas and as we know it may not be the Christmas we’re used to (although I’m aware for some the thought of yuletide spent away from family members is a true Christmas gift)

However for those of us who aren’t part of a Dickensian novel I’ve decided to countdown till Christmas a little differently this year by tweeting a different Christmas cracker joke everyday until the big day, be warned they are truly awful but it may raise a smile,  even a wry one.

If nothing else it  gives me something to do during Lockdown 2 that doesn’t involve baking banana bread!

You can check them out here BriaJ82.

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